Folks Have Lost Their Minds
No, this is not a guide to keeping the Corona virus out of your school. We already have that guide:
Step 3) Stay home if you feel sick
Yes, yes, there is more to it than just that. However, the truth of the matter is that folks usually fail on Step #2 (try not to itch that itch) and, sadly, many fail on Step #1 as well. First of all, I don’t know enough about the coronavirus to tell you what’s what. As a matter of fact, as of this article, the world’s top scientists don’t know enough to tell you what’s what with 100% accuracy.
What Can We Do To Stop The Spread of the Coronavirus
“Nurse Kevin, what can we do to stop this thing from spreading?” My check-out lady at my favorite grocery store asked me this past Saturday. She is the grumpiest, no-nonsense, in-your-face check-out lady in the entire world…and I love going through her lane. I’ll wait for an extra two buggies just to go through her lane and have a chat.
Now picture the scene here. She’s asking me how we can stop the spread of the coronavirus and just 2 feet away is a daddy loading his “supplies” on the conveyor belt behind me while his two children play on the floor…kneeling and bare-handed as they play with the candy…kneeling and bare-handed ON THE FLOOR where many have walked after stepping in a wad of what Big Bad Bubba had spat on the pavement in the parking lot from deep in his oral and nasal mucosa.
My advice to my check-out lady was loud and clear, “First, don’t touch your face. Second, avoid having your children place their little hands on the nasty grocery store floor where hundreds of shoes have tread spreading stepped-in substances from chewed bubble gum, wet and sticky spit and loogies, and residue from a poured-out-half-drank soda (what about the “wetness” at the base of a male, public urinal?).”
During my loud, “educational” rant, the father realized that I was talking about his children and his utter failure. There he was prepping for a possible home quarantine and his children were “mopping up” every cootie that were still viable from the past 48 hours with their little moist hands and touching the wrappers of multiple candies as they begged daddy, “Can we have this one? Can we have this one? What about this one?” The check-out lady and I just stared at him until he got the point. Then he scolded his children, “Get up and off that floor; you two are getting on my last nerve.” The two children stood as they were directed…and… started touching candy wrappers at chest level, “Ohhh, this one daddy! Can we have this one?”
As a side note: Don’t wear shoes in your house
There’s Something Going Around the Classroom
I’m writing this article and prepping for the pending school-shutdown. I hear the office lady, “Yes. He’s here. Hang on.” My hand reaches for my phone in anticipation and I wait for the second ring (there’s a story there). “Hello Mr. Nurse Kevin. [NAME] is feeling sick and has body aches but he still wants to go to school. I know there’s something going around there in his classroom…”
I interrupted, “Madam, there’s something going around on the entire globe; keep him home.”
Yeah for his school spirit!… I guess. But, yes! Stay home.
It’s crazy how folks think. They want others to wash their hands and stay home when they are sick. And at the same time, they truly believe that “I’m not going to get the coronavirus.” But that’s the life of a nurse, right? Tell me that you’ve not had 1000 conversations like this:
Layperson “Nurse, I have these symptoms. Should I worry?”
Nurse, “Yes, go see the doctor.”
Layperson, “Well, I may just wait and see.”
Nurse (thinking to herself), “So, what did you worry me for if you were going to do what you were going to do anyway?”
Stay home if you feel sick. It’s a freebie! Most districts aren’t even counting absences right now…as a student or as an employee. And I am sure your district is being as “forgiving” as our district is being.
STAY HOME if you feel sick or do not feel good.
What’s More Important
I’ve been saying this for a hundred years and even before the “officials” started preaching this: “Don’t touch your face.” But, what’s more important: Don’t touch your face or wash your hands? Personally, I think that washing your hands takes a second place to this rule…a very close second place…but a second place nonetheless. Yes, yes…washing your hands is important. And, yes, we “all” wash our hands after using the bathroom. But, truth be known, it’s “game-over” once you touch your phone. Or the door handle. Or the keypad on the door. Or your office phone. Or your car’s steering wheel. Or…well…you get the point.
I had heard that the coronavirus does not spread through the bladder or bowel. However, that rumor may not be true. There’s information now that suggests otherwise. And, I’m not sure you’re aware…and I only heard this from the grapevine…but…folks play on their phones while they are using the bathroom. Not you…but folks I know. Anyway…as the story goes…the “urge” hits, the bathroom is visited, phone-time during this private-time happens while Mr. or Ms. So-And-So does his or her “business,” handwashing follows and the bathroom is exited WITH PHONE IN HAND. Fact: Your cell phone is dirtier than your toilet.
So, don’t touch your face. Relying on your hands being clean is not a good idea. Just sayin’
What Deal Are We Closing
So, I ain’t sure any of y’all know yet but we just got finished building a house and have been moving for the past week. Yes, it’s been a lot of fun and good times (tongue in cheek). A week ago Thursday we closed on this house. If you’ve ever bought a house before you know the ocean of paperwork that has to be signed at the title company.
I am not sure why people do this…it grosses me out every time I see someone does it and I just grin-and-bare-it the whole time. Why do people lick their fingers and turn the pages or…grosser yet…lick their fingers to get the next plastic sack to fill with groceries (my grumpy check-out lady does NOT do this)? It happens so much that folks don’t notice themselves doing it nor does the one who receives the slobber-laced paper. My wife is more “germ-aware” than I am (some call us germaphobes…but they ain’t laughing now) and she didn’t even notice the finger-licking.
Don’t forget about that dollar bill you got back in change from your favorite bistro, cafeteria, beer joint, chophouse, or tearoom. That dollar may have hundreds of people’s mucosal residue soaked into the fabric (US bank notes (dollars) are more fabric than paper).
For the love of all that is healthy, be aware of licking your fingers and, as uncomfortable as it will be, call out someone (in kindness) who tries to hand you something that they have licked. Let’s pause on letting this one slide (though I am in favor of making this as socially inappropriate as a kid spitting on the school hall floors).
In Walks the School Nurse
When do we send the children home? How do we know if they have the coronavirus or not? What is our policy? How are the other school nurses doing things? How do I know if I am making the right decision? Truth-be-known, there are a million questions just like these and every single one of them have the same exact answer: “Who Knows?”
According to the World Health Organization:
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